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Re: RAT Columbine


Actually, the first thing that has struck me about this is how
desensitized I have become. . .to tragedy, to violence in general. . .and
this scares me, because I SHOULD care, dammit. . .I should not now have
the presence of mind to critique the newscasters, or snort and scoff
because the media have neatly pointed out that the two gentlemen who did
this played DOOM and watched Natural Born Killers over and over. . .and I
ask myself what kind of actor/artist this makes me. . .if I can't
empathize, and care and cry with my fellow beings, what right do I have to
try to portray them. . .how can I move them, when I'm this hollow at
heart. . .and in this darkness the muse saves me. . .for I find that when
I write and speak and act about this, then it reaches me. . .then I can
cry. . .and this is why we are here. . .the media IS hollow. . .and my
cynicism is an allowable safety exit, conviently. . .it is up to us and
our kind, our community to make this real. . .to tell the story. .
.because we are the only ones
who can. . .and by doing it I find I can save myself, too

Rachel Jackson